Paralysis Made Me Find the Vitality to Live
Seiji Ittogi’s life changed forever when a car accident left him paralyzed, facing unimaginable physical and emotional challenges. Through sheer determination, and with support from his family and Buddhist community, he rebuilds his life like a champion.
On May 9, 2015, when I was 19, I was in the back seat of a car that collided head-on with another vehicle. I lost consciousness on impact and came round to find myself in a helicopter on the way to the hospital. Although I couldn’t move and was struggling to breathe, when the paramedics asked me my name, I remember that I was able to respond surprisingly calmly, filled only with the thought: I want to live, I want to live.
Every day was a fight with the fear of death. It was very painful. I think I felt the pain of a lifetime.
My neck had been dislocated. Emergency surgery took five hours. My family are all Soka Gakkai members, and they chanted Nam-myoho-renge-kyo throughout the operation, in which supporting bolts were inserted into my neck. I later learned that many of our Buddhist friends were also chanting for me. I felt the warmth of the Soka Gakkai community and was deeply grateful.
Fighting the Fear of Death
While my life had been saved, damaged nerves meant that I needed a tracheostomy to enable me to breathe through a cannula, and because I couldn’t eat, I was fed by IV and a feeding tube that passed through my nose and into my stomach. Eventually, I was put on a ventilator. Day by day, I lost weight, lost strength and was attacked by high fevers and chills. I did not know what was going to happen. I was afraid that if I went to sleep, I would not wake up in the morning. So, every day was a fight with the fear of death. It was very painful. I think I felt the pain of a lifetime.
Why Was I Living
I was desperate to actually live despite the difficulties that continually arose, so mentally, I had no time to spend on anxiety about my future. I spent day after painful day staring at the white ceiling, inside a body that I could not feel, and that would not move. At times, I wondered what I was living for, but seeing my family every day brought me enormous relief. Little by little, their cheerful smiles and continued chanting gave me hope, and I was eventually well enough to be transferred to a rehabilitation unit.
Rehabilitation: Achievements and Victories
At the start, I couldn’t get out of bed and, if I tried to stand up, I lost consciousness after about ten seconds. It was hard, but I gave my whole heart to rehabilitation. By January 2016, nine months after my accident, I was able to sit in and operate an electric wheelchair.
At the beginning of my recovery, as I couldn’t use my hands, I had managed to write a few characters with a calligraphy brush held in my mouth.
Through rehabilitation, I gained the use of my left hand, and I went on to train myself to use a computer keyboard and also to feed myself. I was later transferred to a specialized hospital, where I was blessed with wonderful doctors and nurses and made friends with other people in similar situations. In total, I spent two years in the hospital. During that time, I utilized my faith and strengthen my resolve to live well, and my room became known among the staff as a remarkably bright and cheerful place.
Building a New Life—Diversity and Inclusion
In February 2017, I was finally able to go home, but as I was still wheelchair bound and undergoing rehabilitation, I needed to consider what to do with my life. With the unwavering support of my parents, I began a distance learning degree course at Soka University. After graduating, I took courses in IT and bookkeeping and chanted to surmount the many obstacles that arose due to my paralysis.
I asked my boss one day why they had hired me. Their reply was, ‘I felt there was only you.’ At that moment, I understood the great benefit of not giving in to the many hardships I had experienced in getting to that point.
In 2023, my persistence and determination paid off, and I achieved my number one goal, which was to get a job. I was hired by a multinational company to fill a position in the Human Resources department in the Diversity and Inclusion team. I work from my wheelchair from home and attend virtual meetings, where I sometimes have to give presentations in English. I shared my story at one of these meetings, and some participants were in tears! It is a great opportunity for me to grow in an environment that values diversity and provides a place for people to play an active role, whatever their challenges.
In less than a year, I was asked to become a team leader. I asked my boss one day why they had hired me. Their reply was, “I felt there was only you.” At that moment, I understood the great benefit of not giving in to the many hardships I had experienced in getting to that point.
Making My Younger Self Proud
I have been in danger of losing my life many times, but because I have my Buddhist practice, I have been able to transform feelings of fear and despair into hope. Even now, there are many things I worry about to do with my body, my life and my work. However, by having faith, I have turned my worries into vitality to live. Whatever your physical ability, your mind can be freed by chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo. And I am now able to truly appreciate the people around me.
Finally, there’s something I’ve been thinking about lately. I’ve been looking at photos of myself as a boy, I want to live a life that the young boy in the photos would be proud of. I will continue to do my utmost to challenge all the trials that come my way in the future.
Adapted from the January 2025 issue of Art of Living, SGI-UK.
